Harvey Jones heralds all the good financial things that will come our way over the next ten years.
When I rashly predicted Another decade of disasters earlier this month, plenty of you suggested I should seek help to overcome my depressive tendencies. How very thoughtful of you.
Well, I've had the therapy, taken the pills and meditated until I turned blue. And now I'm back, all new happy-clappy Harvey Jones, ready to renounce my former miserablism and herald all the financial positives that will come our way in the next decade. So goodbye doom and gloom, here are 10 reasons why the next decade should bring some much-needed financial fun.
The noughties are over
From dot.com boom to banking bust-up, the last decade was one great big economic error, at least in the West. It was A disaster of a decade, but at least it's over. Boom and bust seems firmly entrenched in our economic cycle (are you listening, Gordon Brown?) and the good news is that we've had the bust and the boom should follow. Just don't get carried away this time, and remember to put aside some money for the subsequent bust.
Gordon Brown is going
He's presided over the economy since 1997, but barring accidents, Gordon Brown will soon be handing over the remains to somebody else. Hopefully the next PM won't be addicted to spending money we haven't got, or introducing fiddly new tax laws to win a few cheap headlines. If I pop another happy pill or two, I can persuade myself that George Osborne will make a fine replacement. If I neck the entire bottle, I can believe that somehow Vince Cable will end up in charge.
Technology rules
Think what technology has done for us over the last decade. We can check our bank account status online whenever we wish. We can trade stocks and shares for £10 a pop. We can search for the best mortgage, credit card and personal loan rates, something we would have been forced to pay a professional to do just a few years ago. We can buy travel insurance without leaving our house. Imagine what technology will do for us over the next decade.
House price sanity
The housing market may be slowly recovering, but nobody is expecting a swift return to the days of double digit growth. Prices are likely to remain pretty stagnant for several years, allowing time for wages to catch up. That's great news for potential first-time buyers, who may soon be able to get a great home loan without mortgaging their soul.
We can't make the same mistakes twice
Gordon Brown has already flogged off the nation's gold reserves at rock bottom prices. He can't do that again. Sir Fred Goodwin has already sunk RBS and won't be invited back for a reprise. Sub-prime mortgages can't derail the entire global economy, because there's almost no sub-prime market left (and not much economy either). Bernie Madoff has already been exposed. Northern Rock is already wrecked. Credit has already been crunched. We may make a whole new set of mistakes, but the old ones? They're history.
Great new financial products
Top reward and cashback cards. 12 brilliant balance transfer cards. Unusual ways to make more cash. Free money. 15 freebies. Great current accounts. We're just a few weeks into the new decade and there are already some great financial products out there. Plus there's plenty more to come over the next decade. True, most products will continue to be rubbish, but we are here to help you find the goodies.
You've got time to put things right
Okay, so you've started this decade with an overdraft, and maybe some credit card debts as well, plus a whopping mortgage, but you don't have to end it that way. You've got a whole 10 years to get rid of them and enter the 2020s debt free. Take your mission seriously, and you could complete it much sooner than that. Here are Three great ways to get rid of that overdraft for good, tips on Debt busting credit cards and Five ways to start saving.
The banks will be reined in
Greedy bankers can't be allowed to destroy the global economy again, can they? At some point a politician will realise that if banks are too big to fail, they are too big. Then they will finally act, and any banker who complains will be pelted with rotten fruit. A public stocks outside every investment bank by 2014, that's my happy manifesto. If I close my eyes and indulge in some meditative therapy, I might even believe it will happen.
Steve can't get you
You think you've got it bad, but it could be worse, you could be my friend Marianne. As I explained in a recent Money Dilemma, she is putting her financial future at risk by moving in with her astonishingly annoying and fiscally imprudent boyfriend, Steve. Since I wrote the article, things have taken a turn for the worse. She has just announced that she is going to marry him. It's too late to save her, but there's still hope for you. The next decade is already upon us. Make the most of it.
Ten years is a long time
As the decade passes, the credit crunch and banking bailout will become a distant memory, Gordon Brown will be mouldering forgotten in some musty corner of the IMF, Sir Fred Goodwin will be able to pop to the shops without protection and Northern Rock will be a quiz question. Yes, this too will pass. Although it's a shame we'll still be footing the bill for at least another 30 years as we try to wrestle the public deficit down, avoid national bankruptcy and avert another lost decade... Help! Nurse! The happy pills are wearing off!