Just because America has staggering national debt of over $30 trillion, it doesn’t mean the government is entirely frugal in the way it spends taxpayers’ cash. From blowing $800,000 on an elaborate “conference” to spending $1 million on putting poetry in zoos, here’s our round-up of the strangest federal spending that’ll have you thinking April fools’ day has come early.

In 2014, the Colorado Symphony Orchestra scored a $15,000 grant to put on Classically Cannabis: The High Note Series, a series of three marijuana-inspired concerts during which audience members were encouraged to smoke pot, drink cocktails and munch on gourmet snacks.

In 2017, the National Endowment for the Arts raised eyebrows by funding a bizarre $30,000 performance of Shakespeare's Hamlet by artist Ann Carlson in a New Hampshire field that included dogs and sheep, along with shouting human actors.

The Environmental Protection Agency was criticised in 2015 for allocating $36,700 of taxpayers' money to an organisation tasked with creating a Minecraft version of the Berkshire region of Massachusetts, ostensibly to educate young people about environmental issues.

In 2016, the National Science Foundation shelled out $40,000 to determine whether the social security needs of Iceland's fewer than 200 Syrian refugees were being met. Exactly why this research couldn't have been funded by the Icelandic government is anyone's guess.

The National Institutes of Health gave a grad student grants in 2015 totalling $48,500 to write a book on the history of smoking in Russia. It certainly begs the question: how does this benefit Americans?

The Georgia Christmas Tree Association lucked out when it received $50,000 in funding from the Department of Agriculture to run an ad campaign promoting choose-and-cut Christmas trees. You couldn't make it up.

The National Science Foundation financed a 2014 study to look at the effects of sea monkeys' swimming patterns on water movements, which revealed the tiny creatures make relatively large waves as they swim up and down. Riveting stuff.

Protecting then-President Trump at his Mar-a-Lago and Bedminster resorts didn't come cheap. By way of example, in the first eight months of 2017, the Secret Service was billed a whopping $60,000 by the resorts for the use of golf carts. One trip alone led to a $13,500 bill for the golf cart rental.

Everyone knows flying insects are attracted to light, but the National Park Service had to spend $65,473 in 2015 to find this out. The federal agency concluded that bugs that are used to dark, rural environments fly towards any light they encounter. No kidding.

In 2017, the National Endowment for the Humanities dished out $74,851 to a university to create 3D computer models of up to 15 puppets for viewers to manipulate and play with on a PC or virtual reality device.

Reviving historic resources is a valuable act, but the amount it can cost the US government leaves many wondering if it's worth it. The National Archives used a $100,000 grant to convert 250 hours of 1970s film footage from a New York theatre into digital format, arguing that the preservation of such archives is in the national interest.

Stretching their budgets as well as their limbs, a slew of federal agencies including the Department of Energy and the Environmental Protection agency spent a total of $150,000 between 2013 and 2015 on freebie yoga classes to help calm the nerves of their stressed-out employees.

Essential for anyone living in a seismically active area – said no one ever – an Oregon workshop called How Does the Cookie Crumble? looked into whether gingerbread houses can be made earthquake-proof and other 'cookie lab' experiments. This edible exercise gobbled up $150,000 of federal cash in 2016.

In what is one of the weirder examples on our list, a 2011 study which examined why monkeys throw faeces at each other was aided by $170,000 in federal funds. The study established that the excrement-throwing is in fact a sign of intelligence which, we'll admit, wasn't our first thought.

And that wasn't the only time the government has spent big money on monkeys. In 2014, the US National Science Foundation spent $171,000 (£131k) on a study into the gambling habits of primates. The researchers wanted to find out whether monkeys share humans' 'hot hand bias', a phenomenon whereby people believe that past performance can determine future success even when there's no correlation. The study found that monkeys do in fact share the bias and "love to gamble".

In an effort to figure out why people in the US still use the American Customary rather than the Metric System, the National Science Foundation gave a university professor $188,000 in 2015 to research and write a book on the subject.

In 2016, grants provided by the National Science Foundation and National Institutes of Health funded a study determining whether women were more likely to have played with Barbie dolls as a child than men. No prizes for guessing the outcome of this one.

The National Science Foundation paid for an experiment in 2014 to monitor aggression between couples by allowing them poke to pins into voodoo dolls, concluding that people experience 'hanger' when they're hungry and their blood sugar drops. As if we didn't know that already.

The National Institute of Health came under fire for spending more than $300,000 on a study about people in relationships – which came to the not-so-groundbreaking conclusion that couples are happier when a woman calms down after an argument.

As if things couldn't get any more outlandish, the National Institutes of Health has awarded $356,000 in grants to the University of Kentucky for a five-year study on the sexual behaviour of cocaine-intoxicated quails.

Also in 2014, the National Institutes of Health awarded $387,000 to the National Center for Complementary and Alternative Medicine to fund a series of Swedish massages for bunnies to discern whether Swedish massages are helpful for people recovering from illness.

The National Science Foundation financed research in 2016 to discover if dinosaurs could sing like birds, frittering away $460,000 to scour the archaeological record, only to conclude they probably couldn't.

In 2013, the National Science Foundation ploughed $560,000 into a research project by the University of California-San Diego to find out how long mudskipper fish, which can use its flippers as legs, can last flapping away on a treadmill. Yes, really.

Fans of the iconic band may beg to differ, but the the Institute of Museum and Library Services was criticised in 2009 for wasting money when it awarded the University of California a hefty $615,175 to digitise the Grateful Dead Archive.

In 2017, the US government funded a program which paid obese teenagers to drink SlimFast drinks in a bid to encourage their weight loss. The study led by the University of Minnesota caused outrage at its cost.

Taxpayer money has likely gone on far too many over-the-top events, but this one beats them all: an $800,000 conference which included extravagances like a mind reader, an elaborate networking reception and hotel room parties. The event was hosted by the General Services Administration (GSA) back in 2012.

Pancake house IHOP may be something of a national institution, but whether it's deserving of $800,000 in federal funds is a different question altogether. That's how much was spent on building a new branch of the pancake house in Washington DC. It was justified on the basis that it created jobs, but others argued it was a waste of government funding.

One of the more ironic examples in this round-up, federal authorities in Oregon have set up a waste hotline that actually wastes obscene amounts of money. The hotline costs $200,000 a year to run but hasn't led to any meaningful cash savings for the past four years.

In 2013, federal transportation grants of $800,000 paid for a 'super stop' in Arlington, Virginia, complete with a heated concrete floor. A nice idea except it doesn't do the job. Users have complained the structure doesn't shelter them from the rain or keep them warm in cold weather.

The National Institutes of Health bankrolled a 2016 study by the State University of New York at Buffalo that looked into the evolution of primate saliva, more than enough to get the average fiscal conservative foaming at the mouth.

While serving as treasury secretary in Trump's Cabinet, Steven Mnuchin took seven trips on government planes at a cost of $811,800 to the taxpayer when he could have opted for commercial flights and saved a fortune. Mnuchin even requested an official jet for his honeymoon.

Undeterred by the simple fact that only a minority of people in Afghanistan own a TV, the State Department splashed a total of $852,000 in 2015 creating a made-for-TV cricket league in the country.

The National Science Foundation forked out almost $856,000 in 2014 to try and determine whether captive mountain lions could be trained to use a treadmill. No joke. And if you’re wondering what the results were, the task took the lions eight months to learn.

Zoos are meant for education and conservation, but even so, the expenditure of $1 million on putting up snippets of poetry is hard to justify. The federal funds were used as part of an initiative called The Language of Conservation, which was installed at zoos across the country in 2011.

In 2014, NASA was accused of ignoring the separation of church and state by awarding a grant of $1.1 million to the Center for Theological Inquiry to ponder how Christian religions would respond if alien life was discovered.

A whopping $1.2 million of taxpayer's cash was wasted by the FBI on an art installation that ended up hospitalising a dozen agents at its Miami offices. The cedar creation was giving off wood dust that causes allergic reactions in susceptible people. The sculpture, shaped like a tornado, cost $750,000 to buy from the artist Ursula von Rydingsvard, but its removal and deep-cleaning of the offices brought the total bill over the million mark.

In 2017, the federal government handed over $1.5 million to the University of Florida Institute of Food and Agricultural Sciences to fund a study on what makes tomatoes taste good and how to make them more flavoursome.

Since 2012, the National Institutes of Health has spent a hefty $1.6 million on financial incentives and research in a quest to discover if people who are paid to lose weight drop more pounds than those who aren't.

The federal government has awarded $1.7 million in grants to the National Comedy Center in Jamestown, New York, an immersive museum opening later this year that will feature holograms of famous dead comedians.

In 2015, the Department of Defense doled out a whopping $2 million to hire a team of musicians and researchers to develop robotic music computers that can perform trumpet solos and play alongside human musicians.

In 2014, the Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency pumped $2.4 million into a research project concerned with how to get more 'likes' on social media. The blindingly obvious conclusions? Pictures with faces are more popular, as are those posted by people with a lot of followers.

Remember World of Warcraft? In 2010, the government spent $3 million in order to try to understand how playing the game could improve collaborative work, in a study of Decentralized Virtual Activity Systems (DVASs).

It took a $3 million grant from the National Science Foundation and 2,000 interviews with members of the public for the Scripps Institution of Oceanography to conclude that using the Jaws theme as background music in nature documentaries makes sharks seem more scary.

Over a 20-year period, the National Institutes of Health spent a fortune funding research by Northwestern University into how hamsters fight in a caged environment. The project was cancelled in 2013 following pressure from animal rights activists.

A team of researchers at West Virginia University got $3.5 million from the National Institutes of Health in 2016 to work out why people are petrified of the dentist's chair. Stating the obvious and then some, the researchers found that fear of pain is a key factor.

In 2016, the National Institutes of Health funded a $5 million Brown University study looking at the partying habits of fraternities and sororities, which concluded with the shocking revelation that frats tend to drink, smoke and socialise more than other students, and sleep in later.

A study paid for by NASA on the effectiveness of golf equipment in space has eaten up $5 million of taxpayer's cash, making it one of the most seemingly frivolous things the space agency has ever spent its budget on.

Retail giant Walmart might be starting to phase out cigarettes in some of its stores, but the US government has taken a slightly less direct approach to reduce smoking rates – at considerable expense. A $5 million project called Commune used taxpayers' cash to pay influential young people $100 to quit smoking and then encourage their friends to quit too. Commune hosted branded parties and live music events, and even created anti-smoking art to persuade people to stop lighting up.

In 2014, the Internal Revenue Service threw away $12 million on a two-year cloud-based email software subscription that was never used. It was only after spending the cash that the tax service realised the cloud-based technology was incompatible with the existing system.

In a decision of remarkable irony, the Pentagon made the bizarre decision to supply Afghan National Army troops with "camouflage" uniforms that, er, didn't actually work. The green uniforms, which cost a massive $28 million in taxpayer money, weren't much use in the setting of Afghanistan's sandy deserts.

American taxpayers paid $50 million a year to cover the security costs for New York's Trump Tower. Unlike his predecessors who stuck to the White House and Camp David, President Trump liked to divide his time between a number of residences, inflating security bills in the process.

America's economic sanctions against other nations

In 2016, the Department of Agriculture bought up a mountain of peanuts worth $74 million from financially struggling growers, in lieu of repayments for government-funded loans.

Between 1997 and 2003, the Department of Defense squandered $100 million on flight tickets it didn't use. To rub salt into taxpayers' wounds, the department never even bothered to get the money back on the tickets, which were completely refundable.

A 2013 audit disclosed that Medicare was paying inflated prices amounting to double the market average for vacuum erection systems over a six-year period, blowing $172 million of taxpayer money in the process.

In the late 2000s, the Agency for International Development splashed a colossal $335 million on a diesel-fuelled plant that was slated to supply cheap power to the Afghan capital Kabul. A 2015 audit revealed the plant is seldom used and runs at less than 1% capacity.

What North Korea is spending a fortune on may surprise you

As part of the 2014-2018 farm bill, the US government introduced two income entitlement programs to protect farmers from inflation. Ironically, the programs proved far costlier than the previous provisions, meaning taxpayers had to pay $2.4 billion more than the subsidies they replaced.

There's been a boundary between Mexico and the US since 1853, but the election of Donald Trump in 2016 turned the barrier into a major political issue. The ex-POTUS promised to build a wall 1,000 miles (1,609km) long, with Mexico coughing up the $8-12 billion needed to pay for it. By the time Trump left the White House, however, the megaproject was considerably over budget. Not only that, but the $15 billion that had been spent on it had all come from America's counter-drug and military construction funds.